Wednesday, March 08, 2006

My Story

I figure it's time I tell you a bit about myself. My name is Jimmy Pitts (hence the name 'In the Pitts' as it describes the way my life is as well as you relationship to me by getting a unique view of my life, on top of that it's just a cheap pun.) I'm 22 years old, single, jobless, living with my parents, and while desperate to get out of here not really doing all that much about it, six months ago I graduated from university with a Bachelor of Arts Degree, but with marks slightly too average to continue on without some sort of upgrading.

I grew up literally in the middle of nowhere Nova Scotia, Canada, which was much more fun then it, sounds, as most of the time me and my Siblings would just be running around the woods doing mostly whatever we wanted without having to worry about any of the things you would have to deal with in urban centers. I remember the only real worries being around hunting season when we would have to make sure that we always wore those bright orange vests so that we wouldn't get shot. My parents discovered when I was young so during all this time that I'm talking about takes place with just us and our mother, Clare. I'll get more into that period later but right now I need to skip on to a later period after we moved out of their. When I was 10 we moved and we lived with actual electricity and running water. During the next few years of my life only two notable events took place; the most obvious being the birth of my little sister Freda. The other major thing was not so much an event as an ephiney. Sometime during the winter before I turned 12 I figured out what my life was supposed to be and to what extent I was supposed to live it, what I mean by t is that I saw the ways the world would be if I led the life that I'm on now as well as what would happen if I didn't. That's really all that needs to be said on that subject, just continue to keep it in mind when I explain the rest of my life. So well guess that this now bring us up to the start of the fun part of my life: adolescents, or what passed for one in my life. See I never really had what anyone could properly call an adolescents, sure the physical aspect of it was there (its kind of hard getting around that part of it) but where it failed for me was in the social and emotional part. The social was difficult due to the fact that I was brought up home schooled so any social activity was quite limited. And it was because this social aspect was lacking that the emotional one was as well. I believe that I was 16 when I first entered the public school system, and man was it ever a shock, not the work for the most part that was a joke, but rather the social interaction that takes place when you throw a few hundred teenagers together in a relatively small area. This was something that I was completely unprepared for as my only real social interactions had been with friends of either my siblings or my parents, neither where a very good preparation for the impact of school. My main problem in high school (and it really still is today, although to a different extent and for different reasons) was the fact that during that time I had no real friends at all, sure I had people I hung out with during lunch hour and in the morning before class started, but as far as any socializing after school it was practically nonexistent. Somehow I managed to survive that period of my life, but even that wasn't really anything that was to compare what I would go through my first two years of university. My first two years in university were in short - Hell. I remember dreading the weekends as it would mean that I'd have to watch everyone else get ready and go out to do stuff, but I knew that it would just be one more day alone for me. This was a hard time for me which was completely due to the complete lack of social skills that I had, or rather didn't have, but there is no reason to go into more detail now as most of might eventually come to light later. If my first and second years of university were Hell then my third and fourth years there were Heaven. I guess I knew that some change had occurred in me sometime during the summer before my third year. I was working away from home that summer, and in a place where I was unknown so I was able to give myself much more freedom to behave the way in which I truly wanted to rather then just the way that I thought I should. That summer was great, for really the first time I guess I was able to say that I had people around me who actually wanted me around, which was such a change from my previous two years. During that summer I also met Gillian, a great and fantastic girl who for some weird reason was attracted to me. This was really my first foray into any sort of feelings towards a girl (that's right, for those keeping score I was 20 at the time) but due to the fact that I'm completely shy and have no social skills whatsoever nothing ever materialized out of that mutual attraction (a fact for which I am at least partly glad of now). But that was a good start for me when I went back university in the fall as I was actually able to make some friends that year. For the first semester I hung out with some people for the most part which was great, but I was never really part of their clique, more like someone who just hung around them. However in that semester I also met a number of people who would become actual good friends of mine and who would fully include me in their group. But before I go into much detail about them I have to introduce someone who has, is, and hopefully will continue to be an important figure in my life, and that's Isabelle - or Iz. I first met her in my first year as we had a number of classes together, and you quickly notice someone who is in a bunch of them, but it was not until the third year that I really got to know her at all, and unlike most other girls I met, my crush on her grew greater the more I got to know about her. I could go into great detail about her but it would be irrelevant as this I is not really about her but rather is my tail. As much as I liked her (and believe me that’s not only in the past tense for I still do) I could never bring myself to tell her that for as I've already said (or as least shown) I'm a complete idiot when it comes to any dealings with the opposite sex. So rather then me tell her how I feel I just kept it in and was resigned to just be a friend with her. Now let me get back to my friends. I first met the first one of them and the one who introduced me to the rest on the first day that year. I remember this tall, strikingly beautiful girl come into my room and introduce herself, I remember that all I could think of at the time was "there is a beautiful girl in my room talking to ME, and what am I doing? NOTHING." I was really unable to talk to her in anything other then casual chitchat, and certainly not that she was the most beautiful girl I'd ever laid eyes upon, and believe me I kicked myself on that one. But anyway after that day it was probably another month before I talked to her again. Even though it may have taken a while I eventually became good friends with her by the time the Christmas break came, although at no point was it to go beyond that. By Christmas I had also become friends with the rest of her friends, so by the time I came back for the second semester I could for the first time truly claim that I had some friends. As well as having that group of friends when I got back I also managed to became better acquainted with a number of people whom I really only knew casually. The most important of these was Molly who I really got to know over spring break and who would be the first person that I'd kiss (yes I know I'm 20 now), however even though this was the case the relationship was to go no further then that for various reasons. Despite this I look at this school year as the best one of the four, by far, for as well as having gained social skills (all be it ones that most people have by the time there 14) I was also working out regularly and was getting involved in thins that had interested me since first year but lacked the confidence to do them before. So I guess that’s it for my third year now for the fourth. The forth year was the second best year for me, I was out on my own and I still had all the friends that I’d met the year before, as well I was still keeping active and continued to meet new people. Nothing much happened during this year, mostly just going with the flow and maintaining what I'd started in the previous year. So this then takes us up to graduation and my life after that (such as it is). After graduation I stayed at home with my parents and that’s where I remain today.

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